Module 2.3 – Learn Out Towards Our Edges

We're going to get you ready to start to push your child out towards their edges. You should by now know whether your child has a fixed or growth mindset. Whether they are fixed or growth your aim is to still find those edges!  With a fixed mindset you might not need to push very far to flush out the emotions around learning so make sure you download the pdf Let's Get Wired 4 Learning and brush up on what you are looking out for.

We're going to start you off with one of our favourite challenges! It works a treat every time. In fact we took this challenge to the 2016 Bristol Maker Faire and we had some very competitive fathers muscle in and take over! They did in fact show remarkable resilience, grit and determination along the way and we got our tallest tower yet, at over 2 metres.

So are you ready?  You're prepped as to what to expect - right? You'll looking out for moments of frustration, your child wanting to quit, as well as them showing the ability to start again and problem solve.

Now download the Paper Tower Challenge, get those 20 sheets of recycled paper and give your child their brief. Have fun and remember if your child gets angry, frustrated, annoyed with you - that is OK. These challenges are designed to do that. It is what you say to them, and the language you use that will start to make the difference as you go through more of these kinds of exercises.

Remind yourself, and your child, about what is happening in our brains when we get things wrong. Introduce this challenge as a growing your brain exercise and be explicit that it is open-ended and exploratory so there is no right or wrong - just creative solutions to be discovered along the way. 

When they start to give up help them see the crossroads and the choice they have - give up and the neurons stop firing and wiring together or push on through the difficulties and spark up new neural pathways!

If you have your child's crumpled paper to hand - maybe get that out and talk to them about what is about to happen. Visualising neural activity might be helpful to them when they do start to feel emotions such as wanting to flee - remember it is the amygdala saying 'ahhh - threat - get out of here.'

Be sure to share with us how your first learning challenge goes! 

Check out Alfie's story here - perhaps share this with your child so they can see they are not alone in trying to avoid mistakes. Alfie talks about it as having a scrambled egg brain! https://spark.adobe.com/page/VtDCpPXZxYcMp/

You and your child should by now be familiar with the need to look after your brains just as we do our bodies. So make sure you build in some healthy brain warms up along the way.  Start to collect mini activities and ideas that you can your child can do on car rides or out on walks. 

Think about what your child's switch is and try to relate it to what will interest them. For example, if they are a Communicator they may love warm ups that play with words. 

If they are more of an engineer or tinkerer they might like something that taps into their creativity in a different way. 

Learning obstacles are those things that get in our way of us achieving what we really want to do. We might be scared of getting things wrong (as we've been exploring with the challenges) or we might find it difficult to sleep because something is on our minds. 

Being aware of some common learning obstacles helps our children understand that when we come up against something that stops our learning in its tracks we can always find strategies around them. 

Discuss with your child what learning obstacles they face and what strategies they think they could put in place. Below are some of the obstacles and strategies that a group of students from Martock Primary School came up with as we were working on a project to design a board game.

Obstacles in the Physical Environment

You're too hot, or too cold. You're hungry or thirsty. You're tired. It's too noisy. There are too many distractions.

Strategies 

Bring an extra jumper. Remember your water bottle. Try to go to bed earlier, take a nap or rest during the day if possible. Explain that you need to focus and have some quiet time. Ask for support from parents or an adult if necessary.

Social Pressures - Fear of Failure, comparing ourselves to others

When we stop short of the 'edge' because we are scared that people will laugh at us, or we will get it 'wrong'. When we want everything to be 'perfect'.

Strategies

Be strong.

Think about your good points. Remember when you couldn't do something before, but you persevered and it turned out okay. Know that we are all unique, all have our own strengths and weaknesses. Remind yourself that failure is a GOOD THING! We learn through making mistakes, that is how we grow our minds and draw on the power of YET!

Obstacles in our Internal Environment

How we feel inside, our moods and emotions. Anxiety, stress, worry. Boredom.

Strategies

Have a positive memory to focus on. Smile. Take 3 deep breaths. Share how you feel with someone you trust. Take a short break if you can to have some time alone to calm down. If you're bored or uninspired, jump into a task anyway, or look round for inspiration to get ideas flowing.

Lacking the Right Tools for the Job

Not knowing how to do something. Lacking resources or a certain skill set.

Strategies

Ask questions. Ask others for advice. Learn from others. Be prepared in advance. Make sure you have the right pens or tools that work for you. 'Not knowing' means space to learn!  Be creative and resourceful and look for that alternative solution.

Time

Dealing with deadlines, long term and short term. Rushing so you finish 'first'.

Strategies

Remember that sometimes taking more time means you go deeper into something and learn more. Try not to panic - take a breath and make the most of the time you have. PLAN! Organise your time so things get done. Try using a diary or notebook.

Over this next week spend some time with your child exploring the times and places you and they have felt challenged. Reflect on the times that you've had enough and wanted to stop or run away.

Here are some clues to watch out for which mean your child is approaching their edges:

• Feeling Cross
• Feeling anxious or nervous
• Feeling like you can't do it and wanting to give up
• Telling yourself you're rubbish at something
• Feeling uninspired
• Wanting to run away from something

Then ask yourselves these questions:

When do I stop myself from taking the next step?

When do I say, that's enough, I'm not going to try any more?

Encourage a conversation within your family and your child's friends (or of course your own friends) about where their edge is too. 

In the next lesson we're going to look at setting up a portfolio so you will begin to be able to document your child's Lights On journey and start to see the distance travelled over time.