While many employees want to discuss their career prospects with their managers at least one to four times per year, a shocking 40% never do. In other words, employees won’t ask even when the conversation could help them understand their future.
A Robert Half study revealed a disconnect between managers and their employees on one of the most wanted aspects of any job. Gallup has also found that advancement opportunities remain uneven, and one in four employees lack clear opportunities to move ahead.
Discussing career progression is important for employees because:
- Employees know where they stand
- They know if they have a shot at promotion
- They know whether to start looking for another job
- It is clear what they need to do to get the promotion or pay raise they want
For managers, it makes even more business sense.
- A good relationship founded on communication about key issues increases employee happiness
- An employee who feels as if they have a chance to further their career is more likely to stick around
- An employee vested in their future at the company will be more productive
- An uneasy employee who does not know their value may start looking for work elsewhere
Pew Research has found that low pay, no opportunities for advancement, and feeling disrespected were major reasons workers quit. If progression is so important, and most employees want to regularly discuss it, why do not they?
1. Fear of rejection
For employees not entirely comfortable being straight with their superiors, asking a direct question about their future in the company can be daunting.
Fear of rejection is a common aspect of human nature wherever you look, and employees could even think it might harm their chances in the future if they seem too eager or too focused on their own career over the good of the company.
An Accenture Career Capital report showed that asking for a promotion or pay raise was often the most effective way of getting it. According to the release, most people who asked for a pay raise received one, and many who asked for a promotion received one too.
The point is not that every employee should expect an immediate yes. It is that silence rarely creates the career outcome an employee wants. Managers can reduce this fear by making the path explicit before someone has to ask.
2. Poor self-image
Employees might think they are already being overpaid in their manager’s eyes, and not want to push it. Even if the employee thinks they deserve a promotion or a pay raise, they know it is not their call and ultimately up to how much their manager recognizes their value as an employee.
Employees with poor self-image likely make up the bulk of the 40% who never discuss careers with their manager. They are happy plodding on with the same position they have held for years, believing that they are not cut out for more responsibility.
Research on the impostor phenomenon shows how feelings of fraudulence can affect work outcomes and career self-management. That maps closely to the employee who has evidence of impact but still feels uncomfortable naming it.
Career coach Marty Nemko has argued that many employees fear they are barely worth what their boss is paying them. His practical advice is still useful: you suffer more from not asking than from a rejection.
3. Fear of the truth
Employees might be worried about being told the truth: that their career is not looking like it will progress any time soon.
Situations like this trigger a fight or flight response; the employee must decide whether to stay in the job and fight for a promotion or to look for a better option elsewhere. This is not a position any employee wants to find themselves in. When it comes to knowing who is next in line for promotion, some would rather have blissful ignorance over the hard facts.
Nike Engineering Manager Nishant Bhajaria says in the article Fear is a Great Teacher but a Terrible Master that deserving candidates lose when they hold back out of fear or modesty.
Employees who will not be getting their target promotion are better off knowing so they can look for a job where it will be possible, or so they can work from a clear standard instead of guessing.
4. Managers don’t want an awkward conversation
When there are limited opportunities for career progression in a department, if managers speak with every employee about their career prospects and find each one of them wants the promotion, the manager is at risk of making one employee happy at the expense of disheartening the rest.
No manager wants the difficult “we are actually not promoting you and no, no raise either” conversation, so the tendency to avoid disappointing people is only human.
That avoidance is exactly why modern manager tools matter. A manager needs a lightweight system for compensation review notes, promotion criteria, feedback history, and follow-up actions. That way the difficult conversation can still be specific, fair, and useful.
When the answer is no, the employee should know the specific reason, what could qualify them for a raise later on, and when the conversation will be revisited. Do not sugarcoat or fluff the answer. Be kind, but tell the employee exactly how it is.
5. Managers might not have the resources
No matter how badly an employee wants a raise or a promotion, it could just be a simple fact of no open positions or not enough money to afford it. Which manager would want to admit the department cannot afford to pay its employees a higher salary? That is the sort of thing which would induce panic in the office and create a feeling of hopelessness in every employee.
If there is no opportunity for employees to have a real discussion about their career prospects it could be because there is no room for advancement right now.
Current Robert Half guidance on pay-rise requests emphasizes taking the request seriously, discussing performance and benchmarks, and giving a roadmap when the raise is not feasible right now.
The best response is specific: what is possible now, what is not possible yet, what evidence would matter, when the decision can be revisited, and who owns the next step.
The Catch 22 situation
Jocelyn Goldfien describes asking for advancement as a Catch 22 situation. Employees can have the idea that if you have to ask, you are presumed not to deserve it.
Contrary to a lot of material out there on getting promoted, Goldfien is serious about not simply asking for a promotion. In a good company, you do not get a promotion just by asking for it, being well-liked, being lucky, or kissing up to the boss. You earn a promotion by possessing the qualifications of the next level.
From this perspective, which is more tailored towards startups than enterprises, career communication is worth a lot less if it only means making a demand. In reality, conversations about career paths do not just mean asking for a promotion or a raise. They are valuable times to focus on something other than deadlines and projects for an hour in the year.
They are a time where employees can feel happy about how their manager views their performance and know what they need to be working towards to start moving up.
In short, managers and employees should take this relatively small time out of their loaded calendars to discuss something they feel extremely important. But they do not, because they are scared of what might happen if they did.
FAQs
Why are employees afraid to ask for a raise?
Employees are often afraid to ask for a raise because the request feels personal. They worry about rejection, damaging the relationship with their manager, or learning that their performance is not viewed the way they hoped.
How should a manager respond when an employee asks for a raise?
A manager should take the request seriously, ask for the employee’s evidence, compare it against role expectations and compensation bands, and give a clear answer or next step. If the answer is no, the employee still needs to know what would make a future yes possible.
Should employees ask for a raise or wait for a promotion cycle?
Employees should not wait silently if they need clarity. The best approach is to ask for a career-development conversation before the decision point, then use the promotion or compensation cycle to review evidence, scope, and next steps.